So, I'll start my chemo Tuesday, 4/21/09 (around 1:00 pm) in the doctor's office infusion center. I guess since the port has been placed in (last Tuesday), besides getting my hair cut, not too much has happened, hence the silence on the blog. I know from Dave's doing his blog, no news is good news. We had an enjoyable, quiet, sweet weekend and for that I am grateful.
I think the main thing I'd like to stay before I start my treatment, is I just wanted to tell you, my friends, that I am so incredibly blessed with the support we have received. I put a post up around Thanksgiving on Dave's blog, and I still truly mean it. My faith in "people" has been restored. Don't get me wrong, I stand firm in my faith in God, my life is His, I am His child, but before our journey started last July, sometimes I just wondered how much other people could and do care for others. Well, I know for a fact, having lived it and am still living it, that people never cease to amaze me. I have so many stories to tell that will touch your heart and make you shed some tears, but that's not the purpose of today's entry either, I just wanted to say, "Thank You" to so many of our friends, family and people who have truly lifted us up, in prayer, in caring, in words, deeds, you name it, we've seen it.
I was able to go out for my walk this morning which is something I really have come to cherish. I usually walk, plugged into my iPhone, taking time to breath deep and enjoy the Creation around me. Today was so beautiful too, not too humid, cool, just the right temperature. I needed this walk to talk to myself, to God and really get geared up for the chemo. I've been scared, to be completely honest, only because I have never had such a toxic chemical put into my veins. It broke my heart to see Dave go through his Intensive Chemo like he did and he handled it like a champ, even on the very few "dark" days that he had. I know for a fact, that without the prayers that were being lifted up on our behalf, I don't know how I could have made it through all that. I don't know exactly how I'm going to react, so I think the anxiety I've had, has been more from my personal journey of the unknown. I'll get through it, I'm sure of that, and hopefully it won't be as hard on my system as it was on Dave's (I know for a fact I couldn't have handled the dosage he did)....but again, we'll see how I do, and either Dave or I will keep you posted!
So, I've made it through my first day of pre-chemo meds, a steroid, that is meant to help me not retain fluid from one of the chemo's I'll be receiving. So far, so good, my typing has been a little off and Dave is already telling me my "chemo brain" is kicking in...not good, since I don't get the chemo until tomorrow...yeah, statistics say that 80% of women 45 and over go into menopause because of this type of chemo to treat breast cancer...gotta find the silver linings, you know? I'm looking for them all over the place!
Once again, I can't thank you all enough for the kind words, the prayers, the actual physical helps you provide...meals, helping with Bryce and Kyle, I could go on and on...you, my friends, are awesome!
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3 comments:
I have no doubt that you do have amazing friends there, more than willing to help...'what you sow, you reap'!! You and Dave are special people!! I will be praying for you tonight and tomorrow, and in the following days. Hang tough!!
Holly, May the Lord bless you and O pray you will continue to have this thankfulness in your heart. I can say for sure that it will get you through this so much better than anything. If you ever get to doubting anything, I pray you can simply get beyond feelings and go to trusting the Lord that He has you in the palm of hIs hand, cuddling you and knowing everything about you and your situation. You're more precious than the sparrow. And how much does He care for the sparrow? I hope to one day to truly comprehend how much. I pray He blesses your soul as your body rests in His love.
I am getting my 3rd chemo treatment for breast cancer tomorrow and like you I have been so blessed by the care and comfort I've received from friends both far and near and I've been particularly blessed by friends that have come back into my life that I had known years ago. It is the silver lining to this journey.
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